Public Domain Movie Reviews: 2007

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Trivia

*I was watching a trailer mash-up and Bela Lugosi showed up to introduce one of his movies. Bela himself pronounced his name Bee-la. Logically, it is spelled to pronounce that way as well. In America I have always heard it pronounced Bell-A. Now that I have heard it directly from Bela's own mouth, I will furthermore pronounce it Bee-la. You should do the same. (Although, in America we mispronounce everything foreign, so it may not matter anyway.)

PDMR blog movie rules

*Please note that these are not my personal views, but rather sarcastically and (hopefully) humorously reflect the mentality of these movies. It was the 1930-70s and times were extremely different then. "Political correctness" referred to a non-corrupt politician, and according to these movies there weren't any.

Here's a list of rules that apply to these classic movies:

#1. Suspension of reality makes the story work and the movie enjoyable.
#2. Crime doesn't pay.
#3. All Dr.s are psychokillers.
#4. Cops are abusive and stupid.
#5. Only an independent private detective has the brains to solve a crime.
#6. Politicians are corrupt.
#7. Newspaper people will do anything to get a story.
#8. Blonds are stupid.
#9. Some girls are just bad.
#10. Some guys are just mean.
#11. A group of 3 or more women will have a cat fight.
#12. Smoking non-stop is cool and not at all bad for your health.
#13. A shot of whiskey makes everything tolerable.
#14. The bad guys always get busted.
#15. You'll usually be killed the same way you murdered someone.
#16. All dialogue foreshadows the story of the rest of the movie.
#17. Love will overcome any evil.
#18. Jump to conclusions and suspect the worst from others.
#19. Misunderstandings make for a funny, heart-warming story.
#20. Little old ladies can always see the truth, but they're dismissed as nuts.
#21. Dogs are always super smart, know who the "bad guys" are and always save the day. "Man's best friend" and all that.
#22. Usually kids are innocent and will "accidentally" see you break the law.
#23. A single match, or one candle will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.
#24. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.
#25. The person running away will always fall at least once and eventually be overtaken by the villain-monster that walks at half speed with a limp.
#26. Rather than wasting bullets, villains prefer to kill their enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape. #27. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

However,.......Despite all the bad stuff, there is the supreme PDMRB rule that:

~there is always the happy ending of the bad guys getting busted, while the good people get fame, fortune, and all the couples get married, or reunite. Awwwwwww. sniff, sniff.

Here's another funny list I found online:
Things I Learned From Movies
1. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.
2. All beds have special L-shaped top sheets that reach up to armpit level on a woman but only waist level on the man lying beside her.
3. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
4. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.
5. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.
6. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
7. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.
8. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
9. When paying for a taxi, never look at your wallet as you take out a note - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.
10. If you lose a hand, it will cause the stump of your arm to grow by 15cm.
11. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning, even though the husband and children never have time to eat them.
12. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames.
13. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.
14. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
15. All single women have a cat.
16. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
17. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.
18. Creepy music coming from a graveyard should always be closely investigated.
19. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings - especially if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident.
20. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involved martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessor.
21. During a very emotional confrontation, instead of facing the person you are speaking to, it is customary to stand behind them and talk to their back.
22. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
23. Dogs always know who's bad and will naturally bark at them.
24. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
25. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
26. Having a job of any kind will make all fathers forget their son's eighth birthday.
27. Many musical instruments - especially wind instruments and accordions - can be played without moving the fingers.
28. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
29. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
30. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
31. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

About PDMR blog & Resources

I recently purchased the following three (3) box sets of public domain movies from Amazon.com:

1. Family Collection 250 Movie Pack

2. Horror 250 Movie Pack

3. Mystery 250 Movie Pack

That's 750 movies! And yes, over the next year or so I will be watching ALL of them. I watch 1-3 per day and they are such a joy to me that I decided I must share these treasures with the world.

What originally attracted me to these movies is:

1. they are free to watch on the internet

2. they are black and white classic films

3. the behavior, manners, and dress of the characters is FAR superior and so much classier than anything Hollywood does today. Even murder is done with style.

4. Sometimes there are moments in these films that are hilarious and that makes the movie worth watching.

5. Occasionally there is a true dramatic gem that is a really good film.

6. I've learned where certain tidbits or sayings of our culture started from.

So, I will be reviewing these movies as I go and hopefully the rest of the world will find as much value and joy in my reviews as I find in these movies.

WHERE TO WATCH FREE ONLINE:
Since these films are Public Domain movies they are free for everyone to watch. The catch is that not every Public Domain film is available online yet. The best advice I can give is to use a search engine to find where it is available. I do have a few sites that I have watched many movies on already, so I know there's no threat of spyware or viruses there. However, just because I didn't have a problem doesn't mean you won't and I am not responsible for damage to your computer if you download something, of course. Resources I like:

http://www.archiveclassicmovies.com/watch.html

http://www.moviesfoundonline.com/public_domain.php

http://www.archive.org/details/movies

http://www.openflix.com/